Just Let Me Puke!

I have majorly overeaten today. I can't even rehash what I've stuffed into my mouth today, but this is one of the moments when purging doesn't sound half bad. At least my sour stomach and bloated body would find some relieve.

Note to self: Push away from the table, girl! And throw out the ice cream!

Visualize

Tonight's topic at Weight Watchers - yes, I actually went to the meeting tonight - was about visualizing success. It's amazing how we negative self-talk when we still lose weight! A loss of 0.2 pounds is still a loss! Too bad that I'm up a few pounds.

I'm visualizing my 1990 self - 20 years ago when I graduated from college. I think I was 180# and maybe a size 12/14. I could deal with that again!

Keep on picturing it!

It's Easier to be Fat

Some days I am just resigned to believe that it's just easier to be fat. I love to eat way too much.

Balancing Your Hormones

I started reading Jillian Michaels' new book, Master Your Metabolism, this week, and I must say that that girl makes sense when I think about my own struggle with weight and the craziness that seems to be happening in my body.

Jillian suggests that the way to getting yourself in your best shape possible is to first balance your hormones. This means getting those estrogen levels in check, having your thyroid tested, and making sure you are at the right levels of insulin.

I'm about 1/3 of the of the way through the book, and I'm really, really into it. I hope that once I get past the science of my body -- which I'm a big nerd and really enjoy understanding -- I can kick my butt in gear to really "fixing" my unhealthiness.

It doesn't mean cutting out ice cream, but it means enjoying smaller amounts of the real stuff!

Stress Eating

For the past two months, all I have done is stress eat. For two weeks, I pretty much had nabs and a candy bar for lunch every day. Unfortunately, this was because I have had an incredibly, horribly stressful time at work for the past two months.

I should probably be relieved that the stress eating hasn't caused more of a weight gain -- I'm at least 5 pounds up -- but I can't seem to get back into the cycle of good eating and tracking. Part of it is that I'm still a little depressed from work which I'm sure is complicated by the bad eating habits.

I really just want to sit around the house, never go to work again, and eat all day. Thank goodness there is no ice cream in the house.

I Want Candy!

My sugar tooth is calling for candy. I've probably eaten a pound of those soft peppermint candies over the past week. You know the ones I'm talking about; they just melt in your mouth.

I counted the first few that I ate, but after a while, I figured they were freebies. Probably not the right approach because a pound of peppermints is probably a gazillion calories which means a bazillion points.

Mmmmm, this just makes me want homemade peppermint ice cream.

Just Past 16 Weeks

Wow! I can't believe it's been over sixteen weeks that I've been living healthier, for the most part. I'm down 35 pounds! That's about what my daughter weighs, and I can't imagine carrying her around all the time. It's so amazing to realize how much better your body must feel and operate with that weight gone.

Of course, this means the next 35 will probably be harder to lose. Right now, though I'm just focusing on this week and making it through without devouring every thing in sight. I'm craving salty and sweet foods. But I'm trying my best to plan and count everything that goes into my mouth.

I did discover an incredibly delicious ice cream last week. Well, actually a frozen yogurt. And while we destroyed the whole container, I still managed to lose weight. Yummy!

Ice Cream of the Day: Schwan's Triple Lemon Frozen Yogurt (1/2 cup = 13o calories and 3 grams of fat)